Sucked out the window
Time to begin his journey
Into a brick wall
Tornado watches
Something to worry about?
Or just cool watches?
Clustered in basements
This just helps the tornado
We are easy prey
"Hang on!" Dad shouted
His poor son didn't have arms
Sucked out the window
Caitlyn's haiku:
Textbooks on our heads
Lying face down in a ditch.
Will this stop tree trunks?
Normal Cows go "Moo"
What do Tornado Cows do?
They fly and crush kids
Low wages, Trailers
Things that attract tornadoes
Southern drawls, no teeth
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Haikus: Vol. 7
"Hey Honey, can-" *SMACK*
Don't bug men when they play C.O.D
He smacked that hoe, hard
Feet warts and no bucks
Life's hard as a college kid
They're all I have now
Yo mama's so fat
She could eat fifty children
Like, Literally
I saw an old man
I went up and pushed him down
Then I ran. Go Dawgs.
Kids suffocated
Buildings evacuated
Roommate's got the farts
Caitlyn Hentenaar:
Bearded, Soiled, and Sticky
Send her away, please
Piano Man Haiku:
He tickles the keys
If those keys were young children
He'd be sent to jail
Totally Didn't Happen Haiku:
Thought they were chip crumbs
Who leaves toenails in chip bags?
It's still tasty though...
Dogs will not leave you
You scream "Get help! I'm dying!"
They still won't leave you
Don't bug men when they play C.O.D
He smacked that hoe, hard
Feet warts and no bucks
Life's hard as a college kid
They're all I have now
Yo mama's so fat
She could eat fifty children
Like, Literally
I saw an old man
I went up and pushed him down
Then I ran. Go Dawgs.
Kids suffocated
Buildings evacuated
Roommate's got the farts
Caitlyn Hentenaar:
Bearded, Soiled, and Sticky
Send her away, please
Piano Man Haiku:
He tickles the keys
If those keys were young children
He'd be sent to jail
Totally Didn't Happen Haiku:
Thought they were chip crumbs
Who leaves toenails in chip bags?
It's still tasty though...
Dogs will not leave you
You scream "Get help! I'm dying!"
They still won't leave you
Monday, April 4, 2011
The New, Uncontroversial Pledge of Allegiance
I may or may not pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America,
And maybe or maybe not to the republic/dictatorship/democracy/facist state (choose whichever you feel like) for which it stands,
One nation, between 24.52o N latitude to 49.38o N latitude and approximately 66.95o W longitude to 124.77o W longitude, which is mostly above Mexico and under Canada- except for Alaska- and behind China,*
Indivisible, except for those times when states seceded or threatened to
With liberty** and justice** for all (**depending on your definition of these terms and your views on how the U.S handled certain events, you can leave this part out, or insert a different phrase for "all," like "for old, white men")
The government should start phasing out the old Pledge and replacing it with this new one immediately, although it might take a couple years to teach to the young kids and even longer for them to understand what they're actually saying. It'll also take precious minutes-and-a-halfs away from classtime, which is the biggest case against it already being said in schools.
Alternatively, you can try the Mad-Libs version:
(Person in room) pledges allegiance to the flag of the United (Plural Noun) of (Place)
And to the (Adjective) (Noun) for which it stands
(Number) (Adverb) (Verb) Nation(s)
Under (Noun)
With (Noun) and Justice for (Demographic)
*If you belong to the Flat Earth Society and truly believe that the Earth is not a sphere, and therefore the U.S cannot be behind China, you can omit this part or edit it on your own. Just know that your classmates will make fun of you.
And maybe or maybe not to the republic/dictatorship/democracy/facist state (choose whichever you feel like) for which it stands,
One nation, between 24.52o N latitude to 49.38o N latitude and approximately 66.95o W longitude to 124.77o W longitude, which is mostly above Mexico and under Canada- except for Alaska- and behind China,*
Indivisible, except for those times when states seceded or threatened to
With liberty** and justice** for all (**depending on your definition of these terms and your views on how the U.S handled certain events, you can leave this part out, or insert a different phrase for "all," like "for old, white men")
The government should start phasing out the old Pledge and replacing it with this new one immediately, although it might take a couple years to teach to the young kids and even longer for them to understand what they're actually saying. It'll also take precious minutes-and-a-halfs away from classtime, which is the biggest case against it already being said in schools.
Alternatively, you can try the Mad-Libs version:
(Person in room) pledges allegiance to the flag of the United (Plural Noun) of (Place)
And to the (Adjective) (Noun) for which it stands
(Number) (Adverb) (Verb) Nation(s)
Under (Noun)
With (Noun) and Justice for (Demographic)
*If you belong to the Flat Earth Society and truly believe that the Earth is not a sphere, and therefore the U.S cannot be behind China, you can omit this part or edit it on your own. Just know that your classmates will make fun of you.
Friday, April 1, 2011
I'm Not Writing This
My name is Billy
I am so Silly
I want to live in Philly
My favorite flower is a Lily
My name is also Will
My dad calls me Bill
Sometimes I like to Kill
I have a hole to Fill
My name is also Theo
I like to play in a Trio
I can drink a whole Kilo
...It's hard to rhyme now...
My name is William Theodore Hentenaar.
I am so Silly
I want to live in Philly
My favorite flower is a Lily
My name is also Will
My dad calls me Bill
Sometimes I like to Kill
I have a hole to Fill
My name is also Theo
I like to play in a Trio
I can drink a whole Kilo
...It's hard to rhyme now...
My name is William Theodore Hentenaar.
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